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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24278977">Shards</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/4Lorn/pseuds/4Lorn'>4Lorn</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Catra (She-Ra) Needs a Hug, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hallucinations, Healing, Hurt/Comfort, Mental Health Issues, Minor Violence, Nightmares, POV Catra (She-Ra), Post-Canon, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-03 01:01:34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,972</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24278977</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/4Lorn/pseuds/4Lorn</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Her dreams are of white and black and green. Green eyes and green lightning and green liquid. White hoods and black symbols and clawed white hands. They seem to follow her in her dreams, just at her heels as they were in those metal corridors, taunting her just beyond the edges of her vision. Catra hears the whispers sometimes, those raspy voices bleeding and blending together in a cacophony of noise. Catra sees him, not in her waking moments, thank the First Ones, but always in her sleep. </p><p>Maybe she should be grateful for that.</p><p>But this? Catra can't get past this.</p><p>or</p><p>Catra struggles to overcome her trauma. Adora and her friends try to be there along the way.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Adora/Catra (She-Ra), Bow/Glimmer (She-Ra), Entrapta/Hordak (She-Ra), Netossa/Spinnerella (She-Ra), Perfuma/Scorpia (She-Ra)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>303</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This first chapter will be somewhat shorter than future ones, but I wanted to get the beginnings of this out there as soon as possible.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Her dreams are of white and black and green. Green eyes and green lightning and green liquid. White hoods and black symbols and clawed white hands. They seem to follow her in her dreams, just at her heels as they were in those metal corridors, taunting her just beyond the edges of her vision. Catra hears the whispers sometimes, those raspy voices bleeding and blending together in a cacophony of noise.</p><p>She hears <em>him</em>. His voice haunts her even outside her dreams, grating at her ears like nails scraping along a metal wall, the same way she used to do in the Fright Zone when she was angry. Catra sees him, not in her waking moments, thank the First Ones, but always in her sleep. Sometimes, she feels like he sees her, too. His dark eyes follow her, making her skin crawl long after she wakes. She feels his clawed fingers scraping across her chin. He couldn't bother to get his hands dirty when Catra was "purified," so it's the cold hands of the clones that she feels in those dreams. Maybe she should be grateful for that.</p><p>That small detail isn't enough, though. Nothing is, and it eats at her, in a way almost as strong as the guilt of all her past actions do. At least those she can move forward from. Catra's many mistakes still remain in the back of her mind, yes, but she has begun her reparations for those. Those she can apologize for, and use the time she has left to maybe one day repay the moral debt she has accrued these past three years. Over the months, Catra has slowly chipped away at the hatred and fear the people of Bright Moon have for her. Bit by bit, they have begun to trust her, so she knows that she <em>can</em> move forward.</p><p>But this? Catra can't get past this.</p><p>It is a night like many others. <em>His </em>eyes linger in the back of her mind, framed by so many more green ones. Cold hands on her wrists, twisting her arms behind her back so she can't escape. Two clones force her to her knees at the edge of the green pool and he nods at a third one. Catra can't help but flinch at the knife that flashes at the edge of her vision. Instead of cutting her throat, the clone begins to slice through her hair.</p><p>Catra hisses at the clone and jerks her head away, but another hands shoots out to grip the hair on top of her head, forcing her to hold still. As the clone continues to saw away, there is a disappointed <em>tsk</em>.</p><p>"Such a shame," <em>he </em>says. "You had such spirit. You would have made a fine attendant, <em>little sister</em>."</p><p>The chanting begins: "All beings must suffer to become pure." The clone finishes cutting through Catra's hair and releases its grip on her, stepping away. She looks after it desperately, as if expecting it to come back and save her. But it simply walks away, and Catra knows…</p><p>She looks back as <em>he </em>begins to speak again. "No matter. You will have use to me yet." He has moved, and now towers over her on the opposite side of the green pool. "I tried to be gracious, but you refused my generosity, and now you are <em>alone</em>." He pauses to consider her for a moment. "But you need not suffer anymore."</p><p>He snaps his fingers.</p><p>The clones shove her into the green pool. Catra tries to come back up, but their hands keep her under. There are sparks, and then there is green electricity crackling across her skin. Catra feels as if her very soul is burning, and she opens her mouth to scream. The thick green liquid fills her mouth and nose, and then…</p><p>And then Catra is gone.</p><p>She jolts up in bed with a shriek, hands scrabbling at the back of her neck. Her eyes burn. Her throat feels raw. Breathing hard, she searches frantically around the room for any sign of danger. It takes a long moment, but she soon realizes she is in her room in the castle of Bright Moon, and no longer on the ship. Soft moonlight shines through the tall window on her left, reflecting off the lake outside of the castle. Catra realizes she has broken into a sweat and swallows hard, trying to get her breathing under control</p><p>"Catra?"</p><p>Catra yowls and lunges from the bed. She would rather throw herself out the window and into the water than lose herself like that again. One hand protecting the back of her neck and the other baring claws, Catra whirls around, fight and flight vibrating through every fiber of her being.</p><p>"Catra." She registers Adora's voice before anything else. "It's me."</p><p>Catra sheaths her claws, shame and embarrassment burning her cheeks. "Hey Adora." Even after all these months, she still hasn't gotten used to sleeping next to Adora every night.</p><p>"Are you…" Adora looks her over, eyes full of concern, and Catra clenches her jaw. "Did you have another nightmare?"</p><p>Catra doesn't answer. She turns away to look out the window at the rest of Bright Moon. It exudes a quiet, one that is peaceful and full of life, the utter opposite of the corridors that haunt her dreams. Fireflies dance through the air just above the surface of the lake. Catra thinks she sees glowing green eyes beneath the water and blinks hard until they go away.</p><p>"Catra?" Catra still doesn't answer. She hears Adora sigh quietly behind her. There is rustling and then the sound of bare feet padding across the floor. Adora gently touches Catra's shoulder, but draws back when she flinches. "Sorry."</p><p>"S'okay," Catra mumbles.</p><p>Adora steps up beside Catra. One of their blankets is wrapped around her shoulders. She carefully surveys Catra's face for a long moment before moving her gaze to look out over Bright Moon. "You had another nightmare," she says, not as a question this time.</p><p>Catra wraps her arms around herself. "Yeah."</p><p>Adora releases a frustrated breath.</p><p>Catra drops her ears, guilt eating at her. "Sorry I woke you up again."</p><p>"No, that's not-" Adora massages the bridge of her nose. "It's not that.</p><p>Catra can't look at her. "Then what is it?"</p><p>"I just…" Adora sighs again, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. "I just want you to be better."</p><p>Catra look down at her feet, eyes burning. "I'm sorry," she apologizes again, feeling herself sink lower.</p><p>"No, no, please don't apologize." Adora steps in front of her and slowly reaches out to tilt her chin up to look at her. She withdraws her hand after she's done so, before Catra can flinch away. "This isn't something you need to apologize for."</p><p>"I need to be…" Catra swallows hard. "I feel like I should be over this by now."</p><p>"You don't need to be anything." Of course Adora knows what she really means. "You need to be you."</p><p>Catra bites her lip. "But I'm not me. Not with-" She gestures helplessly to her head. "-this."</p><p>"Yeah," Adora says softly. "I know."</p><p>They stand there staring at each other for a long moment, not speaking. Then, Adora opens the blanket with her arms, inviting Catra in if she wants, but not demanding. The old part of Catra demands she flee, out of the room and out of Bright Moon and straight into the Whispering Woods. Instead, her shoulders slump. She steps forward and lets Adora wrap her in a warm hug.</p><p>Catra rests her forehead against the top of Adora's shoulder. "I don't want to do this anymore, Adora," she whispers.</p><p>Adora doesn't say anything, just nods her understanding. She messages the back of Catra's neck in the way she knows she likes. Her fingers run over the scar there, a constant reminder of the chip. When Entrapta's device interrupted the network, the chips simply popped off of everyone else, but Catra was not to lucky. Entrapta had removed it prior to using the device just to be safe, and it had left a blocky scar behind despite the princess's best efforts to prevent it. She and Spinnerella had compared one day a few weeks after it was all over and found a strange solace in their matching scars.</p><p>Catra can't help it. She buries her head in the crook of Adora's shoulder and purrs. She feels Adora smile against the top of her head. "You're adorable."</p><p>Catra stops purring and lifts her head away to look up at her. "Am not," she says, wrinkling her nose.</p><p>Adora laughs. "Are so."</p><p>Catra snorts. "Okay."</p><p>Adora looks at her adoringly. She leans down and softly kisses her on the lips, then leans her forehead against Catra's. "I love you, Catra."</p><p>Catra doesn't answer for a long moment. Somehow, Adora still leaves her breathless. But she knows that this, at least, is real. "I love you too."</p><p>"Come on," Adora tells her gently. "Let's go back to bed."</p><p>Catra shakes her head. "I can't go back to sleep after that."</p><p>"That's okay," Adora assures her, not missing a beat. "We don't have to."</p><p>Catra considers that for a long moment, and then nods. "Okay."</p><p>Still wrapped up in the blanket, the two of them move to the bed. Adora releases her, and then climbs in, holding the covers open for Catra. She crawls in beside her and buries herself into the other girl's side. Giggling, Adora sweeps the covers over them and wraps her arms around Catra. The purring returns, and for a time, they simply lay there, warm and content. Catra listens to the sound of Adora's heartbeat, tracing the spot on her chest where the Heart once glowed.</p><p>After some time, Adora softly asks, "Do you want to talk about it?"</p><p>Catra tenses up, thinking about green eyes and chanting and drowning. Gone.</p><p>Does she?</p><p>"I…don't know," she admits.</p><p>"That's okay," Adora murmurs, pressing her lips to the top of Catra's head. "You don't have to until you're ready."</p><p>Catra's heart melts. Despite all the love she holds for Adora and how happy she makes her, she does not know why the other girl loves her back, especially after all she has done. Adora has a heart of gold and a soul full of kindness, and the fact that she chooses to gift that to Catra is something she will never stop being grateful for. Catra takes a deep breath. She still has trouble opening up to those around her, but she owes Adora this. She lifts her chin to kiss Adora and then settles into her side.</p><p>"I was on the ship," she begins, and hears Adora suck in a breath. "They were… <em>purifying</em> me, so they could put the chip in." She swallows hard. "They cut my hair, shoved me in…. I couldn't breathe."</p><p>Adora gives that a second to sink in, then asks, "Was it <em>him</em>?" She learned not to say his name after the first couple times when Catra shut down on her. It had been fine when they were still fighting him, but now…</p><p>"Yeah," Catra rasps. "He couldn't bother to get his hands dirty but he was there. Talking."</p><p>"What did he say?" Adora whispers, almost fearfully.</p><p>"He said…" Catra clenches her jaw. "He said I still had use to him. He said I was his. He said I was alone, that no one would come for me."</p><p>Adora tightens her grip on Catra, reminding her that she <em>did </em>come back, that she was not alone. Neither of them speaks for a while, but Adora eventually asks, "Did it happen like that?"</p><p>"I don't know," Catra rasps. "Maybe? I don't really remember. It's almost like I wasn't really there when it happened. I was…"</p><p>
  <em>Gone.</em>
</p><p>"He's gone, Catra," Adora reminds her. "He's not coming back."</p><p>"I <em>know </em>that, Adora," Catra snaps. "You don't have to tell me that. But it's like part of me still thinks he around." She runs a hand through her hair, tapping her fingers against her head. "In here."</p><p>Adora is quiet for a long time before she says, "I want you to talk to Perfuma."</p><p>Catra makes a growling noise at the back of her throat. "I don't want to talk to that flower fairy about why I can't sleep."</p><p>Adora sighs tiredly. "I'm tired of you waking up in the middle of the night screaming. I want you to be better."</p><p>Catra glowers up at her. "I'm not broken.</p><p>"I didn't say that," Adora responds patiently. "But you have nightmares all the time. You see things that aren't there. You aren't broken, but you also aren't happy." She puts a gentle hand on Catra's cheek. "I want you to be."</p><p>"You had nightmares too."</p><p>"I <em>had </em>nightmares," Adora emphasizes. "I think…" She seems to consider her next words. "I think opening up to someone will help you."</p><p>"I open up to you," Catra grumbles.</p><p>"I was never part of the hive mind." When Catra begins to draw away, she pulls her back in and hurries to say, "I will always be here for you, Catra. Always. I love you, and you're my best friend." The sincerity in her voice makes Catra looks up at her face. There is only love and acceptance and care in her expression, and Catra's breath catches in her throat. "But I don't always understand what's going on in your head. I want you to be able to talk to someone who does."</p><p>Catra hesitates. "Why Perfuma?"</p><p>"Perfuma is good with helping people with things like this," Adora says with a shrug. "And if not her, she can help you find someone who does."</p><p>"I…" Catra starts to object, but the words die in her throat at the look on Adora's face. She cannot argue with the girl who has given her heart to Catra, even after everything. She cannot argue with Adora, whose selflessness saved the universe and whose kindness saved Catra.</p><p>Catra would give anything and everything for Adora. She can give this too.</p><p>"Okay."</p><p>The grin Adora gives her is totally worth it.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Catra talks to Perfuma and Scorpia, and tries tea for the first time.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Catra hunts down Perfuma the next day.</p><p>She finds her poised gracefully in the pastures outside of Bright Moon. She sits with her eyes closed and her legs crossed. There are flowers sprouting in a circle around her and – strangely enough – cacti. Catra doesn't ask questions. She isn't sure she wants to know.</p><p>She pads up to the flower princess and opens her mouth to speak, but then thinks otherwise. The air here is so still and quiet, Catra doesn't dare interrupt the moment. She opens her mouth again. Closes it again. Purses her lips.</p><p>Perfuma opens one eye to peer up at her. "Hello, Catra," she says airily. "Have you finally come to meditate with me?"</p><p>"Uh… not exactly."</p><p>Perfuma opens both eyes at the tone of her voice. Her gaze is surprisingly intense, and Catra avoids eye contact with her, finding a sudden interest in the castle's architecture.</p><p>"Catra?" Her voice is so soft and kind and unaccusing that Catra can't help but to look back at her. There is such warmth in her eyes that it makes Catra both comfortable and uncomfortable all at once.</p><p>"I thought I should…" Catra looks down at her feet and shifts nervously, fingering the scar at the back of her neck. "Adora wanted me to talk to you."</p><p>Perfuma tilts her head and blinks at her. "About what?"</p><p>Catra clenches her jaw, trying to muster up the words to say what she needs to say. Talking never seemed to be that hard for her before. It <em>shouldn't </em>be this hard. Why is it now?</p><p>Slowly, Perfuma nods, almost as if she is confirming something to herself. She rises gracefully to her feet and brushes the grass of her dress. The plants around them shift as if they too are emerging from a strange slumber. Perfuma smiles at Catra and begins to make her way through the pasture.</p><p>Catra frowns. "Where are you going?"</p><p>"Come," Perfuma says, motioning for her to follow. "We'll talk over tea."</p><hr/><p>Perfuma's cottage is small and humble, yet bursting with life. Vines climb across the walls and in through the open windows. The wood beneath has been painted a brown-red color, and an array of colorful flowers bloom all along the vines. It looks similar inside, with only two smaller rooms and a kitchen branching away from the main room. There is simple furniture scattered across the cottage, accompanied by pots of lilies and daisies and dozens of flowers for which Catra has no name. It is the type of place one would imagine a grandmother to live, full of old wisdom and warmth.</p><p>It makes Catra sick to her stomach.</p><p>"Sit," Perfuma says, motioning to the two small couches in the middle of the main room, situated on opposite sides of a tiny coffee table. "I'll make the tea."</p><p>As Perfuma begins bustling around in the small kitchen, Catra warily makes her way over to the couch. She sits, then immediately hisses and leaps back up when something brushes up against her elbow. She whirls to see venus flytrap larger than her hand draped across the armrest.</p><p>"Oh, that's just Viktor, don't mind him," Perfuma says casually, as if this is a normal thing to have growing on the arm of a couch. "He can make some people uncomfortable, but he's really a sweetie. You're welcome to sit on the other one if you'd like!"</p><p>Catra does so, keeping an eye on Viktor the entire time. From the kitchen, Perfuma asks, "What is your favorite?"</p><p>Without thinking, Catra answers, "I've never had any." There is a clatter and Catra looks up to see Perfuma staring at her with a horrified expression. "What?"</p><p>"You've never had tea?"</p><p>Catra blinks at her. "We didn't have tea in the Fright Zone."</p><p>The look of shock on her face makes Catra flatten her ears to her head. But then, instead of the judgment that usually accompanies an expression like that, Perfuma's eyes light up.</p><p>"You've never tried tea!" she squeals. Her hands fly as she readies a kettle and hot water and cups. "There's so many different types to try! I can't wait to see which ones you like! I get to help you on your journey!"</p><p>She begins to rattle off what Catra assumes are different flavors. Eventually, they (a.k.a Perfuma) decide to start with one called mint green tea. Catra isn't sure whether she should be grateful or afraid, so when Perfuma hands her the cup of steaming liquid, she takes it without a word. Perfuma settles into the couch opposite of her with her own cup and stares.</p><p>Catra scowls back at her. "What?"</p><p>"Are you going to try it?"</p><p>Catra rolls her eyes, but the staring is making her uncomfortable. She sniffs the tea cautiously. Detecting no horrendous odors, she gently blows on it like she would hot food. A quick glance at Perfuma and the princess's encouraging nods confirms she is doing it correctly. Catra sips, rolls it across her tongue, and then swallows.</p><p>Perfuma leans forward. "Well?"</p><p>Catra screws up her face. "It's gross."</p><p>Instead of looking disappointed, Perfuma simply beams. "Mint must not be your thing. We'll try a regular black tea next time."</p><p>"Okay," Catra says dubiously, setting the cup down on the table. "Sure."</p><p>Perfuma takes a sip of her own tea. She puts one hand out to pet Viktor and then looks at Catra. "You looked tired."</p><p>Catra startles and opens her mouth to answer, but again nothing comes out. She knows what she should say, what she needs to say, but her voice simply refuses to work. She looks down at her feet, her hand unconsciously coming up to rub at the back of her neck.</p><p>"You're having nightmares, aren't you?"</p><p>Catra's eyes shoot up to look at her. "How did you-?"</p><p>"Scorpia had them too." Perfuma lets out a small sigh and sets her tea down on the table. "I think a lot of people who were chipped did."</p><p>"Did," Catra points out. "I'm still having them."</p><p>"Well," Perfuma muses. "You had more than just the hive mind to worry about. Adora told me what happened. You <em>were </em>on Horde Prime's ship."</p><p>The name makes Catra flinch violently. She squeezes her eyes shut and puts both hands over the back of her neck, checking that the skin is full and intact, just in case. Nothing other than that. No metal. No wires. Still, despite all of that, there is a flash of something.</p><p>Green eyes. Clawed hands. <em>Little sister.</em></p><p>Catra digs her claws into her skin, trying to remain grounded. There are sparks of pain across her body, and cold hands on her wrists. Adora flickers in and out of her vision, a horrified expression on her face. White cloth brushes against her arms, the slight weight of a white hood draped over her head. The feeling of not being in control of herself. <em>He</em> is in her head. She can't get away from him.</p><p>"Catra?" Perfuma's voice sounds far away. "Catra, come back to me."</p><p>Something brushes against Catra's cheek. She shrieks and her eyes snap open. Without thinking about it, she lashes out. Her claws catch a vine, ripping the petals off of the red rose which has sprouted from the end. Catra stares at it. She doesn't remember it being there. She looks at Perfuma, and the princess gives her a reassuring smile.</p><p>"It's okay," she says encouragingly. "It's just a rose. Take one"</p><p>Swallowing hard, Catra looks back to the vine. More roses are blooming down its length. She picks one with trembling hands and cradles it in her palms. The vine retreats and Perfuma hums. Catra looks up from the rose.</p><p>"I'm sorry," the princess apologizes. "I should be careful what I say."</p><p>"It's…" Catra wants to say something in response, but she can't seem to come up with the words. She has just been shocked out of and back into the present quite suddenly, so instead, she just shakes her head.</p><p>Perfuma considers her for a long moment. Her next words are soft. "You've been through a lot, Catra. It's going to take time for you to heal."</p><p>"It doesn't matter," Catra croaks, staring down at the rose in her hands. "Everyone else is over it. I should be too."</p><p>"Trauma doesn't work like that."</p><p>"I am <em>not </em>traumatized," Catra snaps, glaring at her.</p><p>"Maybe not," Perfuma allows, holding up a finger. "But you are healing."</p><p>"Yeah right!" Catra crushes the rose in her hand and drops it. "If I'm healing, then why can't I sleep? Why do I keep having nightmares? Why do I keep reliving what happened to me? The chip is <em>gone</em>, so why can't I get him out of my <em>head</em>?"</p><p>Perfuma stares back at her. "He's not in your head," she answers calmly. "Your mind just hasn't figured that out yet."</p><p>"So <em>how</em>-" Catra forces herself to take a deep breath. Once she feels like she can speak again without exploding, she manages, "How do I make it figure it out?"</p><p>"Hm." Perfuma looks up at the ceiling in consideration. "I can give you some tea to help with the sleep if you'd like."</p><p>Catra's ears perk up. "You can?"</p><p>Perfuma brings her gaze back down to earth and smiles at her. "Of course! I'm not sure you'll like it, but I can give you some if you want to try."</p><p>"I…" Catra nods. "Okay. Great! That solves the problem then!"</p><p>Perfuma tilts her head to the side, looking confused. "But you-"</p><p>Just then, the front door bursts open. Scorpia squeezes through, loaded down with several paper bags full of food and flowers and various other items. "I just got back from the village!" she explains as she struggles to close the door behind her. "I got bananas and marigolds and pansies and bread, just like you asked!" She blunders into the kitchen and drops the bags onto the counter. "I saw Netossa and she made fun of me! Like, how rude is that! It's almost like she-" Scorpia finally looks up and spots the two of them sitting on the couches. She looks shocked for a moment, and then grins widely. "Hey, Catra!"</p><p>Catra shifts uncomfortably. "Uh, hi Scorpia."</p><p>Scorpia continues her tirade without missing a beat. "Anyways, yeah I met Netossa in town, and she was all like 'feeding bananas to flowers is cannibalism!' and I tried to tell her that the bananas weren't for the plants but we had some baby ducks that came around sometimes that we fed bread to, and then she told me that bread isn't good for ducks! Did you know that bread isn't good for ducks, because I didn't know that. So I said-"</p><p>Catra tunes out the rest of what Scorpia is saying. Knowing her, she could go on for an hour. She looks down to see the crushed rose by her feet. Lowering her ears, she bends down to pick it up off the floor and cradles it in her hands. It looks defeated in a way so many people did when she was in charge of the Horde. She's learning not to be like that anymore, but sometimes…</p><p>Catra jumps when two elegant hands cover the rose in her own. She looks up to see Perfuma leaning across the table, a small smile on her face.</p><p>"Healing takes time," she says softly. "It might not be fair, but it can take a lot of effort too. It can be hard, but there are people here who care about you. You'll fall down, but we'll be here to help you pick yourself back up."</p><p>Catra can't help it. Her eyes well with moisture. "So what do I do?" she croaks.</p><p>"Adora wanted you to talk to me," Perfuma responds. "I want you to talk to people who are going to understand." She glances over her shoulder at Scorpia, who is still babbling away in the kitchen, then looks back at Catra. It's pretty clear what she means.</p><p>Catra blinks back the tears and nods. Perfuma lets go of her hands and leans back. The rose has bloomed again, its red petals once more full and healthy. Catra stares at Perfuma and the princess giggles.</p><p>"Sometimes we just need a little help," she finishes.</p><p>"Catra!" Suddenly, Scorpia vaults over the back of the couch Perfuma is sitting on. The princess moves to hug Catra, but stops short when she instinctively leans away. The pout on Scorpia's face makes Catra feel bad, but it only lasts a moment before the smile has returned. She falls into the couch beside Perfuma. "Why are you here?" Her eyes widen and she waves her claws in front of herself almost defensively. "Not that I mind! I just haven't seen you in a while and didn't expect you to come here of all places! We're kind of out on the edge of Bright Moon and-"</p><p>Perfuma lays a hand on Scropia's shoulder, stopping the avalanche of words. "Catra and I were just chatting over tea."</p><p>"Tea?" Scorpia's eyes find the two cups on the coffee table. "Oh my gosh!" she squeals to Catra. "You're trying tea? It's amazing isn't it? My favorite is oolong. What's yours?"</p><p>"Uh, I don't have one…yet."</p><p>Scorpia nods firmly as if she expected as much. "It took a while for me to find some that I like."</p><p>"Speaking of tea…" Catra looks at Perfuma. "You said you had some that could help me sleep?"</p><p>"Oh, right!" Perfuma jumps to her feet. "I'll get that right now!" She winks at Catra and then leans down to peck Scorpia on the cheek before disappearing into the kitchen.</p><p>Scorpia glows from the kiss, but there is obvious concern etched into her face when she asks Catra, "You're having trouble sleeping?"</p><p>Catra looks down at the rose in her hands and shrugs. Perfuma is obviously trying to give them space to talk, but Catra still feels nervous around Scorpia at times. She still hasn't forgiven herself for everything she said and did to the other girl, even if Scorpia herself has.</p><p>"Nightmares?" Catra perks up her ears and looks up at the princess. "Yeah, I used to get them too."</p><p>"Used to?" Catra inquires.</p><p>Scorpia rubs the back of her head sheepishly, not – Catra notices – in the place where the chip was. "It took some time, but eventually I stopped having them. I get these little dreams every now and then, but they're not as bad."</p><p>Catra shifts, but she can't help herself. "Can I ask…what you dreamed about?"</p><p>Scorpia seems surprised at the question, but not bothered by it. "It's kind of hard to describe," she says, putting a claw up to her chin in thought, the other one petting Viktor subconsciously. "It was a lot of quick flashes. A lot of bad emotions. I kept having these small moments of clarity where I was attacking my friends. I think that was the worst part. And I…" Scorpia places both claws in her lap and takes a deep breath. "I felt like I wasn't me. Like I wasn't…"</p><p>"…in control," Catra finishes for her.</p><p>Scorpia looks up from her claws and nods solemnly. "Are your dreams like that?"</p><p>Catra looks away, contemplating how much she should tell Scorpia. Every fiber of her being tells her to say just yes, to just let it be. But Perfuma was right. Healing isn't always easy. Finally experiencing just how much Adora has grown over the years has taught her that, if nothing else.</p><p>"Kind of. There's that and…" Catra takes a deep, steadying breath. "<em>Prime</em> did something to me on his ship. It's almost like he… wiped away who I was, and I-" Catra puts a shaking hand up to where the chip used to be. "I haven't been able to get part of it back."</p><p>Scorpia is quiet for a long moment. Then, she stretches one of her claws across the table to Catra. Catra hesitates, then takes it.</p><p>"Hey," Scorpia says gently. "You're Catra. You're headstrong and emotional and sarcastic and you've never let anything stop you in your life. If anyone can get that part of you back, it's <em>you</em>."</p><p>Catra pulls her hand away and wraps her arms around herself. "That's the thing. I don't know if I <em>want</em> to get it back." At Scorpia's confused expression, she explains, "Who I was in the Horde…. I don't want to be that person anymore. I did a lot of terrible things to a lot of people…." Her voice drops to a whisper. "You of all people know that. I don't want to get that part of me back."</p><p>"Catra," Scorpia sighs. "You know I've forgiven you."</p><p>"I know that!" Catra snaps. She takes a deep breath and wilts. "But why? With how I treated you? I don't deserve it."</p><p>"No offense, Catra," Scorpia says with a little laugh. "But I think that part is up to me."</p><p>Catra stares at her. "What do you mean?"</p><p>"Well," Scorpia says, shrugging. "I'm the one who gets to forgive you for what you've done to me. That's up to me, not to you." She smiles disarmingly to take the bite off her words. "It's not fair for you to decide that for me."</p><p>Catra stares at her for another long moment, and then smiles down at her feet. "Yeah, I guess you're right."</p><p>"Besides…" Catra looks back up at Scorpia. "Your time in the Horde made you who you are today. Sure, a lot of us did bad things while we were in the Horde, but that's how we got here. It taught us to be strong, and to fight for what we believe in, and it's from all the bad parts of the Horde that we learned how to be better. And it wasn't just you. Me, Adora, even Entrapta and Hordak!" Scorpia gets up and move around the table to stand beside Catra. She offers her claw again. "We're gonna learn how to be better, Catra. All of us. Together.</p><p>Catra ducks beneath Scorpia's outstretched arm and moves across the room, closer to the entrance. "I hurt a lot of people without the help of the Horde," she croaks. "I hurt a lot of people even when I didn't need to for the Horde. I knew deep down what I was doing was wrong, but I did it anyways, just because I was selfish and angry and lonely." She looks up at Scorpia, eyes burning. "How can I ever make up for that?"</p><p>"You admitting that now means something, Catra," Scorpia says, slowly moving closer to her. "Even the people who were never a part of the Horde have hurt others. That's just a part of life, and none of us can change what we've already done." She carefully places her claws on Catra's shoulders. "All we can do is move forward and be better. We let the people we've hurt decide when they're ready to forgive us, and accept it when they do. We let the people who care about us help us, and we do the same for them in return. We let them love us, and we love them back, because that's what all of this was for."</p><p>Catra flattens her ears to her head. "Do really think even I'm worth that?"</p><p>"I know you are." Scorpia smiles, not a trace of doubt on her face. "And hey, if you need help finding that missing piece, just let me know. I'm great at hide and seek!"</p><p>"I…" Tears well up in Catra's eyes. She can't find the words to express her gratitude. Instead, she does something that surprises even her. She steps forward and wraps her arms around Scorpia's wide torso. "Thank you."</p><p>Scorpia stiffens in surprise for a moment, then returns the hug with enthusiasm. "Anything for you, wildcat."</p><p>"Here's the tea!" Perfuma emerges from the kitchen with two sizable jars of yellow-brown liquid. "It's chamomile!"</p><p>Scorpia squeals and releases Catra. "I love chamomile!"</p><p>Perfuma holds the jars away from Scorpia. "They're for Catra."</p><p>Scorpia lets out a sigh so full of disappointment that Catra considers telling Perfuma to keep the tea. But then the princess chirps, "There's some left in the kitchen," and Scorpia disappears with an excited gasp.</p><p>"Here." Perfuma hands the jars over to Catra with a smile. "Drink a small cup of this before bed. You can warm it up if you need to. It should help you sleep. And just let me know if you need anymore!"</p><p>Catra takes the jars from her gratefully. She isn't sure what she can say to express how much she appreciates everything Perfuma has done for her, so she just says, "Thank you, Perfuma. Really."</p><p>Perfuma beams. "Like I said, keeping your heart open can be hard, but it's worth it."</p><p>"Yeah…" Catra looks at the two jars in her hands. "I guess it is."</p><p>Scorpia appears once more from the kitchen, glowing. A small, delicate cup full of steaming tea is clasped carefully in her claws. "You're going to love the chamomile," she tells Catra. "It's even better with sugar!"</p><p>"We'll see," Catra allows. She moves towards the door, then stops, her ears perking up. "Wait." She turns slowly to Perfuma. "You can add sugar?"</p><p>Perfuma looks slightly confused, but nods.</p><p>Catra grins. "Cool." Then she pushes through the door and is gone.</p><p>There is a moment of silence before Perfuma turns to Scorpia with a concerned expression. "Why do I have the feeling I shouldn't have told her that?"</p>
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